weekend's here again

shades of grey

"No matter how powerful we get around here, they can still just draw a cartoon," she sniffs. "So all you've done is prove to them that I'm a meaningless secretary and you're another humorless bitch." - Joan, Mad Men "The Summer Man"

I got into an argument with a coworker about the mexican journalist and lockerroomgate. Sure, she was wearing tight pants. Sure, she ruined her case by then taking back that she was offended. What's interesting to me is that men can't see how precarious it is to be a woman in the workplace. Using wording like 'asking for it' and 'deserves' starts down a daisy path that gives me chills. My coworker's argument was that she was looking for a husband or a sugar daddy. The assumptions in that made me uncomfortable. Is every girl in tight pants looking for a free dinner? Maybe she got dressed for herself or for her boyfriend or hell for her GIRLFRIEND. Maybe she works damn hard for that body and fuck if she doesn't want to show it off.

"If a woman who’s marketed in a sexual context was noticed in a sexual context, then what’s the big problem?" - Fox Sports coverage of Ines Sainz

She was marketed in a sexual context? You mean because she's an attractive tv personality? How is that different from any woman you see on television? When was the last time you saw an unattractive female on tv? So you notice her body, but what gives you the right to remark on it? Especially when the remark is a power play, when it says, that's for me to notice, that's mine/could be mine/you need my approval. The male does the seeing and the woman is the object of such views.

It makes me want to reach for my muumuu. Some men think attractive women have it easy and no doubt I'm sure there are perks. But that said, it's also limiting. First and formost, you are THAT. And god forbid you want to be something more. There is also that fine line about how to react to sexual connotations and discussion of female bodies at work. You think we want it to be a big deal? We want to be one of the guys. Peggy wants to be down. There are always going to be situations that test the limits of good humor.

GENERATION ME

"Life for young American college graduates is a festive affair. Free of having to support their families, they mostly have gay parties on rooftops where they reflect at length upon their quirky electronic childhoods and sometimes kiss each other on the lips and neck."
— Gary Shteyngart (Absurdistan)



"During emerging adulthood, Arnett says that young men and women are more self-focused than at any other time of life, less certain about the future and yet also more optimistic, no matter what their economic background. This is where the “sense of possibilities” comes in, he says; they have not yet tempered their ideal­istic visions of what awaits. “The dreary, dead-end jobs, the bitter divorces, the disappointing and disrespectful children . . . none of them imagine that this is what the future holds for them,” he wrote. Ask them if they agree with the statement “I am very sure that someday I will get to where I want to be in life,” and 96 percent of them will say yes. But despite elements that are exciting, even exhilarating, about being this age, there is a downside, too: dread, frustration, uncertainty, a sense of not quite understanding the rules of the game."

- ROBIN MARANTZ HENIG "What Is It About 20-Somethings?" NYTIMES MAGAZINE 8/18/10

long weekend away

happy escape from the city.

TO THE EAST:




and then because its always been perfect to me.

the esctasty of influence

with a view of the mountains

the older woman who sat next to me at the wedding told me about her son moving home. she said she was happy to have him back again, after the ten years he spent on the east coast finding a bride and pursuing his career. there's something of a mother's pride in having her children close. I can't say I exactly understand it. after commenting on how lovely the bride, she offered that souvenir meant 'memory' in french.

"that's so nice, isn't it? a perfect word for it." she smiled and I nodded absently.

later I thought of dave berman and one of his poems, about how the only thing a souvenir reminds you of is the moment you bought it.

never look back