This story made my morning. The rest of the story is lovely, equally hillarious, and quietly sad. DFW has Trebek wear a button that is the title of the blog post.
"'My favorite word,' says Alex Trebek, 'is moist. It is my favorite word, especially when used in combination with my second-favorite word, which is loincloth.' He looks at the doctor. 'I'm just associating. Is it OK if I just associate?'
Alex Trebek's psychiatrist says nothing.
'A dream,' says Trebek. 'I have this recurring dream where I'm standing outside the window of a restaurant, watching a chef flip pancakes. Except it turns out they're not pancakes- they're faces. I'm watching a guy in a chef's hat flip faces with a spatula.'
The psychiatrist makes a church steeple with his fingers and contemplates the steeple.
'I think I'm just tired,' says Trebek. 'I think I'm just bone-weary. I'm tired of the taste of my teeth in my mouth. I'm tired of everything. My job sucks string. I want to go back to modelling. My cheek muscles ache, from having to smile all the time. All this hair spray is starting to attract midges. I can't go outdoors at night anymore.'"
- David Foster Wallace Little Expressionless Animals
Note: This is fiction and where real proper names are used here, they denote only objects of public perception and record, not persons alive or deceased.
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